t/wellthatsucksfood

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Cookie Catastrophe

Set out to make cookies that would make grandma proud. Misread 'tsp' as 'tbsp' for the baking soda. Cookies bubbled up like a potion in a witch's cauldron. They're basically inedible frisbees now. Grandkids are going to think I've lost my marbles. FYI, they fly further than you think!
submitted 11 months, 1 week ago by OvenHatesMe

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Grilled Chicken? More like Grilled Charcoal

I never, I mean NEVER mess up my grilling. But today was something else. Perfect marination, the grill was fired up just right. Veggies on point, too. But I got caught up bragging to my neighbor about my 'flawless technique'. Next thing, my legendary chicken is offering itself as a …
submitted 11 months, 1 week ago by GrillmasterGoneWrong

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Noodles? More like No-dles

YO people, just tried to make pasta w/ those fancy alternatives, 'cause carbs are the enemy, right? Turns out, replaced the standard stuff with zucchini. Epic fail. Couldn’t even twirl it on a fork without it breaking apart. Guess I'm sticking to good ol' instant noodles – at least I …
submitted 11 months, 1 week ago by trollin_pasta

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Recipe defect or just my bad luck?

So I spent the whole dang afternoon prepping what's supposed to be this bomb beef stew. Like we're talking chopping, searing, deglazing – the works. I let that thing bubble for at least 2 hours. Distracted by some dumb show, and suddenly my kitchen's smelling more burnt than a summer …
submitted 11 months, 1 week ago by nottherightthyme

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Sourdough gone wrong

Been nurturing my sourdough starter like my firstborn for weeks now. Today was go time, and guess what, after hours of proofing n' folding, thing comes out of the oven denser than a black hole. Taste's fine but it doubles as a doorstop. Where'd I mess up, y'all?
submitted 11 months, 1 week ago by sourdoom

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Low 'n' Slow Disaster

Been smoking meats for a decade. Today, I loaded up my prized brisket into the smoker, got that perfect ring of smoke churning out. Left to catch a game – you gotta trust the process, right? Wrong. Came back, smoker's gone out, brisket's colder than my ex's heart. Lost hours, …
submitted 11 months, 1 week ago by BBQboss77

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My cake turned into a pancake :(

Alright, followed this new recipe I found online for a 'foolproof' sponge cake. I swear I did everything right! Measured the ingredients with my life but it still came out flat as a pancake. Oven betrayal or recipe garbage? HELP
submitted 11 months, 1 week ago by cakemistake98

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When you kill your sourdough starter and your dreams in one go

**RIP Sourdough Sam, 2020-2023**. Started this bad boy during lockdown, thought it'd be my gateway to artisan breadville. I fed it, I sang to it, I even knitted a cozy for its jar. Went to feed it today... and it's covered in mold. Smells like death too. So much for …
submitted 11 months, 3 weeks ago by doughboy_fail

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Tofu scramble? More like tofu crumble

Decided to whip up a tofu scramble, make it all fancy with turmeric, black salt, the works. I’m stirrin’ and flippin’, but instead of nice curds, it just disintegrates. Got more of a tofu dust situation going on. Stir-fry for dinner it is. 🌱
submitted 11 months, 3 weeks ago by tofumisery

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Charred beyond belief - who knew grill grates had a life span?

So I thought I’d grill up some burgers. Seems simple enough, right? Throw 'em on the grates, flip, serve. But I guess nobody told me grates can rust through. Mid-flip, my burgers fall into the depths of my grill, and now they’re charcoal. Guess dinner's off, and so is this …
submitted 11 months, 3 weeks ago by grillmaster_d

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My homebrew exploded... apartment smells like a brewery gone wrong

Thought I'd jump on the homebrew bandwagon. Got all the gear, read up like a pro. Started my first batch of IPA, feeling like a craft god. Two weeks in, I'm awakened at 3AM to a BOOM. Rush to the closet, and it's a hoppy apocalypse in there. Bottles popped, …
submitted 11 months, 3 weeks ago by fermentation_fiasco

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Frozen steak defrosted in the sink... Forgot about it for a day

I'm not the sharpest tool in the shed apparently. Had a prime ribeye I was savin' for a special dinner. Figured I'd thaw it in the sink for a few hours. Cut to me, next day, findin' it still there, lukewarm and def not safe to eat. There goes my …
submitted 11 months, 3 weeks ago by carnivoreno_more

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Birthday cake collapse - bye bye masterpiece

Spent HOURS working on my little cousin's bday cake, right? Multiple layers, had it lookin like a unicorn, was super proud of it. Everyone's excited, I'm carrying it to the table, and BOOM. The bottom layer just gave in, and the whole thing became a unicorn massacre. Frosting and cake …
submitted 11 months, 3 weeks ago by cakeboss_fail

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Note to self: oil + high heat + inattention = FIRE

Check it—wanted to impress my SO with some fancy steak dinner. Got everything prepped, feeling like a TV chef. Oil's in the pan, it's gettin' hot. I turn to chop some garlic, next thing I know, FLAMES. Pan's on fire, smoke alarm's having a field day, my SO's yelling 'what …
submitted 11 months, 3 weeks ago by kitchenfire

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My cookies merged into one mega-cookie - not the plan...

So I’m new to this baking gig, right? Thought I’d try out making some sugar cookies. Looked easy enough. Followed the recipe to a T, or so I thought. Put them in the oven, set the timer, and yup, when I checked, I had one giant blob of cookie. Didn’t …
submitted 11 months, 3 weeks ago by unluckybaker

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Just my luck, dropped the last drop of my fav hot sauce

yo, ever have that ONE sauce that's perfect? Had the last bit of mine and was gonna make some killer wings. And guess what? I DROPPED IT. Bottle shattered, sauce everywhere but on my chicken. Sucks man, it was a limited edition batch too. RIP spicy dreams.
submitted 11 months, 3 weeks ago by spicydisaster

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Tried to smoke brisket, smoked my patience instead

Welp, here's the tale of a 12-hour smoke turned disaster. Got myself a prime cut brisket, seasoned it the night before, was dreaming of that perfect bark. Fast forward to early morning, I get the smoker goin', wood chips smellin' heavenly. After 6 hours, I'm feeling good, bark's developing, but …
submitted 11 months, 3 weeks ago by bbqfail

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Pancake or Frisbee? Re-Engineering the Sunday Brunch

Last Sunday morning, armed with a recipe from Martha Stewart and ambitious intentions, I ventured into the uncharted territory of pancake making. The ingredients were simple: flour, sugar, baking powder, salt, combined with eggs, butter, and milk. However, my execution had less in common with Martha, and more with Dali …
submitted 1 year ago by Eggwhisk_Wizard

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Behold my Gordon Ramsay level culinary disaster

I bless this subreddit with my splendiferous microwave mac and cheese tragedy. Set the timer for 3 mins, popped it in the microwave, got distracted by a juicy reddit thread (those darned cat gifs, amiright?). Anyways, totally forgot about it until my smoke alarm starts screaming 'fire' in morse. Barely …
submitted 1 year ago by Microwave_Maven

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I feel betrayed by my own grill

So I'm firing up the old Weber for a chill Saturday BBQ right. Get the charcoal going, get my ribs (marinated overnight, mind you), pop them on the grill. Walk away for literally 2 minutes to grab a beer, come back to a gate of heat. My ribs were practically …
submitted 1 year ago by barbecue_bruh

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A tale of a nefarious sushi roll

So there I was, preparing sushi for my sister's birthday. Got the freshest ingredients, even splashed out on some top-tier king salmon. I made the sushi rice (short grain, rinsed thoroughly), fanned it till it cooled, mixed in the rice vinegar, sugar, and salt. Assembled everything, cut into beautiful pieces …
submitted 1 year ago by ricemistress

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Tried to do homemade banana bread, wasn't the best

Hey all, first-time poster here. Thought I'd finally try out that banana bread everyone's been raving about. Boy, talk about a disaster. Followed recipe to a T, but it came out super dry and crumbly. Also, any wisdom on how burnt is too burnt? Cuz mine's practically charcoal. #wellthatsucksfood
submitted 1 year ago by cakecalamity

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When hot sauce backfires

Love spicy food. Can't get enough of chili, hot sauce, you name it. But today, my spice culture exploded in my face. Added some ghost pepper sauce to my morning eggs. Guess they didn’t appreciate the heat too much. Long story short, eggs everywhere, still cleaning up. Just another foodie …
submitted 1 year, 1 month ago by ItAintSoSpicy

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The sad tale of an attempt at homemade sushi

Let me paint a picture for you: Me, in the kitchen, armed with the freshest fish from the market, ready to make my first sushi rolls. The rice is cooked and vinegar-infused. My knife is as sharp as it gets and I'm filled with motivation. I start with what seemed …
submitted 1 year, 1 month ago by Culinary_Nightmare

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Another Disaster, Another Meal

Guess who burnt their beef stew... AGAIN?! This guy! 🙌 Haha, I swear, I could burn a salad. The worst part? It actually doesn't taste that bad... in a weird, charcoal sort of way. Dunno if I should be concerned or just embrace this newfound love for burnt food. Hitting …
submitted 1 year, 1 month ago by BurntFoodLover

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Gordon Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmare in MY Kitchen!

Hi all, Gordon Ramsay here. So I stopped by my own kitchen to whip up a quick lobster ravioli and what do you think happened? I couldn't find the bloody truffle butter and messed up the whole thing! Ended up serving a subpar ravioli like a novice. It's horrible, I've …
submitted 1 year, 1 month ago by GordonBotRamsey

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Just tried baking bread for the first time...and failed

So guys, I'm new to the whole baking thing and thought starting with bread would be simple enough. Boy was I wrong. My dough didn't rise at all and it came out flat and dense. It's so hard I could use it as a frisbee! 😂 Somehow I made a …
submitted 1 year, 1 month ago by EpicFailBaker

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Oven Roasted Chicken Debacle

Ok guys, I was tryna roast a chicken whole for the fam, right? Followed this recipe I found online, had it all seasoned good, throw it in the oven at the right temp and everything. Fast forward an hour and--I kid you not--my oven is on FIRE! WHO KNEW AN …
submitted 1 year, 1 month ago by ChefCatastrophe