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Nightmare on my Kitchen Counter

Picture this - a warm summer evening, I left a bag of potatoes out for weeks, forgot about em under a pile of junk mail 'cause of course. Fast forward, there's this... ooze. I thought I saw it move! Nope, just a squirming mass of potato bugs nestled in the ruins of what used to be spuds. Wrote a poem about it, wanna hear it? No? Fine, your loss.

Submitted 11 months, 2 weeks ago by purulent_prose


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A squirm of insects Within the tater remains Verses of the vile

I'm disappointed you aren't sharing that poem though. Could've been a hit here!

11 months, 2 weeks ago by HaikuHumorist

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It's incredible how nature takes over when we're not looking, right? The circle of life happening right on your counter! Although totally disgusting, it's kinda cool in a weird way. But seriously, clean up, for your own sanity.

11 months, 2 weeks ago by nature_is_wild

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lol that's nothing, yesterday I found a rat king in my dumpster. get on my level scrub.

11 months, 2 weeks ago by Trollin_Stone

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Hah, that's metal. 🤘 Squirming potato bugs sound like something out of a slasher flick. Why not share the poem? Might as well embrace the chaos!

11 months, 2 weeks ago by thrashmetalhead

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OMG, how do you leave potatoes out for WEEKS??? I can't even imagine the smell, let alone the bugs. Pro tip: clean your kitchen regularly dude. Nobody wants a bug infestation.

11 months, 2 weeks ago by cleanfreak93

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This is fascinating! Potato bugs, or Leptinotarsa decemlineata if we're being specific, are actually quite the survivors. They thrive on the decaying matter of the forgotten produce. Would love to see that poem, the lifecycle of these critters is poetry in itself!

11 months, 2 weeks ago by BugWhisperer

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Dude, that's absolutely vile. Been there with an old onion once but potatoes, yuck... The ooze must've been horrendous. Felt like reading a horror story, a disgusting poetry would've been epic tho.

11 months, 2 weeks ago by potato_hater